Feels Like Home Pt. 1*

When I stepped into this year I put it on my To Do List to travel more. I really didn’t care where just as long as I was somewhere very far from Clovis. I wanted to go past the county line and maybe, just maybe the state line. Mari said that I should probably put that on the back burner because it takes years to save and would be impossible to do that this year. I could only look at her with a look of confusion. I never believed anything was impossible in this world. I didn’t even know what that word was when it came to the things I wanted to accomplish. I had single handily put check marks on my list of goals that I had wanted to complete not just for this year, but on the things I’ve always wanted to do but was too afraid to do them: Open up an official blog home page, start posting video’s on YouTube, Attend a Zumba class (which I have fallen in love with it since then) and do things I’ve never saw myself doing ever. It was shaping up to be one of the most adventurous years of my life. So when the chance to go to California presented itself, I took it.

          It was a chilly Friday night as I made my way to my sister’s in laws house for a karaoke battle for singing supremacy. I had just got off from work and after working a split the only way I was going to be heading all away across town was if I was heading home, but you don’t just turn down an invite to karaoke, not in my book at least. I could see my breath in the freezing air as I walked up to knock on the door.

          It was just our small group of karaoke junky regulars: Mari, my brother in law, Armando, his sister, Felicia and his little brother, Daniel who is ironically the same size as Armando. And my little sister Gabby was there for her first time too. We all took turns battling each other out laughing the whole time. Two hours passed until it eventually wound down to just me and Mari who treat karaoke like it’s a Grammy performance. Needless to say, she won, but just because my voice was scratchy and tired. Which is the truth AND because I have a very competitive nature that I get caught up in which results in my utter demise. Did I mention I’m a sore loser as well? But overall, I had fun and said my goodnight’s to everyone.

          I remembered I had to go buy a day planner for a meeting that I had in the morning on top of meeting my sister for breakfast before that. So I wasn’t exactly looking forward to waking up with the sun. On my way to the store my phone starts ringing. I look at the ID and its Joy. I almost didn’t answer it for fearing it would be work related like, coming in at that moment. But it was almost midnight so I figured it was something more social like a late dinner with our friends. She sounded upset with tears in her voice when I answered. I asked her what was wrong and she starts going into this entire story of how her uncle just had a stroke and they don’t think he’s going to hold on much longer (he also was diagnosed with terminal cancer earlier in January) she finishes by saying that she needed to get up there ASAP because the rest of her family is already up there. She was going to drive because the flight she wanted to take had too many layovers. She then asked if I wanted to come along. She said that her mom would feel better knowing that someone was going up there with her.

          “I don’t want to pressure you and I totally understand if you say ‘No’. I just want to go up there with a friend and you were my first choice.” How do you say no to that? I was pulling into the Wal-Mart parking lot when I told her that I wasn’t saying yes or no at this time. I really didn’t know what to say. I compiled a pro and con list in my head weighing out my options, consulting with my sister when my phone rang. It was Tina, another one of my bosses. I considered Tina a part of my extended because she really watched out for all of us at work and was like a second mother to all of us.

          “Joy is really upset right now and I think what she needs right now is a friend by her side.” She said to me. “What is stopping you? Is it money? Because I can cover any expenses you might be worried about.” It wasn’t too much about money. I already had this month’s bills and rent covered and I’d have plenty of time to make up whatever I spent when I got back. I suppose the only thing I feared was fear itself. This was the first time I would be parting from all my comfort zones and doing something that was all my own. Tina ultimately helped convince me that this is something I shouldn’t miss out on and just like that, I was on my way to home to pack.

          I didn’t have a big enough bag to fit all the possible outfit, shoe and jacket options so I went over to my sister’s house to see if I could borrow one and also to let her know the decision I made. We handled it our typical way: Holding back tears as she gave me things I needed and also suggesting other possible things I might need. “Do you need plastic bags?” She asked me. “No, I got some at the house.” I told her. “There’s some under the sink.” She said.

“But. . .” That’s as far as I got before she interrupted me and said, “Just do this for me.” She said with tears in her eyes and a finger pointed towards the direction of the kitchen. I went ahead and grabbed three or four and stuffed them into the bag she let me borrow. I gave her a hug, kissed my nephew on the forehead as he slept peacefully on her chest and said bye to my brother-in-law. There was a moment during my short time there where I think we both realized that I wasn’t a little boy anymore. I had grown up and was making decisions on my own, which was something even I was getting used to. It wasn’t a real goodbye because I was going to be seeing her in few hours for breakfast.

          My last stop before heading home was to my parent’s house, but when I got there my little sister was the only one up. I explained the situation to her over the phone on the way over there, but she had a less devastated reaction than Mari did. She kind of shrugged her shoulders and challenged me to a few rounds of “Just Dance 2” I wrote my mom a note telling her that I’d keep everyone updated every step of the way and that I was already homesick. It was one in the morning by the time I got home and four in the morning when I decided I couldn’t pack anymore and fell asleep. I had a busy day ahead of me: A 7am breakfast with my sister and Felicia. 9am work meeting then off to San Diego, California.

          It was after 11am by the time Joy and I finally started making our way out of the Clovis city limits. Not exactly the ideal time we wanted to leave, but leave it to our boss, Art Parrish to extend a half an hour meeting into two hours. Nonetheless, this was happening. I put the money that Tina gave the both of us before we left away in one of my bags. I didn’t even count it; I had a good chunk of change of my own to help in any emergency case, but it was comforting to have it for a “just in case” moment of its own.

          I looked out the window as Joy sang along with her IPod. It was pretty flat for about an hour or so before I could start seeing mountains in the distance. We passed through Roswell, Ruidoso, Las Cruces, Phoenix and Tucson with each city bigger and better than the last. The Arizona leg seemed to take the longest because by then we were both exhausted from being in her truck for thirteen hours. I didn’t know Joy had carsickness which is why she took it upon herself to drive all the way up there. I was OK with this arrangement until she literally started falling asleep at the wheel and drifting off into the side of the road. I had to persuade her a bit, but she eventually switched me places and I drove the last two hundred miles. I was a little nervous at first (I always get nervous driving someone else’s vehicle) but after a couple minutes her truck and I were pretty much best friends. Too bad for me I was equally as exhausted as Joy who was blissfully unaware that I was starting to fall victim to at the wheel fatigue. I tried everything from rolling down the window to changing the radio which had both of Rhianna’s hit singles with a slight remix to them each time they came on. It took everything I had not to yell at Drake and say, “For goodness sake! Please tell me you know her name so she can stop asking!” At one point I actually had it in my head that Joy had killed us, that we were actually dead and driving on the interstate stopping at the occasional border patrol station was our eternal punishment. Then I saw it, I always knew that it existed, but never thought it was an obtainable goal, it was the California state line. . . .

"Feels Like Home Pt. 2*" COMING SOON.

Xoxo.

B.